She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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