We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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