thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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