I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
my shit smells like andre
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
