He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
