It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
