I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
