she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
3pm strippers are depressing
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
