Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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