This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
