i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
