I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize