I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
We're too hungover to prance.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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