Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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