Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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