Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
the day after is always just damage control
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
