Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
