Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
