I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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