You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
