that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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