Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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