I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize