Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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