and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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