She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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