i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
