New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
