is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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