better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
