i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
