You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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