dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize