Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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