I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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