I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
