Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I should be sponsored by Trojan
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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