I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
