Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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