I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
