walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
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