barbara walters just said penis...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize