he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize