somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
