They should really pass out barf bags in church
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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