I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
