Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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