Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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