the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize