I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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