There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
